Simrita

AtmaKaraka Planet

Atma means the soul and karaka means significator. Atmakaraka is the significator of the soul’s desire.

According to the Vedic philosophy a soul is reborn because it has unfinished desires that were left unfulfilled in the previous lives and it is born again to get another opportunity to satisfy them.

The Atmakaraka planet shows the nature of the individual’s soul. It shows the soul color or soul flavour of that particular person. It is the planet that we have the most karma to work with in this life.

Sun:

When Sun is also char atmakaraka, the person automatically posses Leadership qualities. He is Authoritative and self confident. But he will be egoistic. He need to learn how to overcome the Ego and become humble. This is the purpose of the soul in this birth.

If sun is your atmakaraka You are learning to fine-tune and cultivate the qualities of the Sun. Showing self-expression, being in charge, learning how to execute justice while in charge, being the center of attention, being magnanimous and generous, cultivating creativity, cultivating charity, showing passion and fire in your work, learning to let others shine, learning to defer to others and not always want to be first, learning to become humble, learning to temper pride and express it in healthy ways rather than unhealthy ways that may destroy close relationships.

Moon:

Emotions and compassion towards others becomes a big issue. Due to excessive emotional dependence, the native may always be looking for relationships, or relationships will be looking for them.

You are learning to fine-tune and cultivate the qualities of the Moon. Being nurturing towards those in your immediate vicinity, such as family members, friends and co-workers, etc., caring for others, developing compassion, growing emotionally, helping others in their emotional affairs through showing understanding (not trying to give advice or change the person unless requested), nurturing plants or pets/animals, caregiving the young, the old, or the sick as a mother would, taking care of the home and family, conducting public affairs in a caring and nurturing way.

Mars:

Short temper, or excessive anger/violence may be expressed or experienced by the native, and the native should make a conscious step to throw away any weapons and grudges and learn the path of non-violence or ahimsa.

You are learning to fine-tune and cultivate the qualities of Mars. Being assertive and aggresive, being athletic, showing strength of body, showing strenght of mind, showing strength of will-power, fighting for the underdog, fighting for justice, tempering the qualities of Mars by channeling anger in a constructive manner, using the force of Mars constructively instead of destructively, making changes in your life through constructive force.

Mercury:

When to speak and when not to speak becomes a major issue either for the native or his/her social circle. Such people should be particularly careful of what they say, and to whom they say it.

You are learning to fine-tune and cultive the qualities of Merucry. Always learning something new, developing writing and speaking skills, learning what your patterns of thought are and re-channeling the less constructive patterns, learning new languages, reading a lot, acquiring knowledge, using knowledge, writing, and/or speaking ability to redirect others in a more positive direction, improving mathematical ability and analytical skills, continuing the learning experience even in old age for a young mind.

Venus:

Venus being a Atmakaraka in a horoscope represents that soul need to go through some learning especially in relationships matters in this life.

Relationships and sex becomes a major issue for such people. The person should always try to maintain purity in relations, and not to overindulge in casual sex.

Learn to let go of your vices, learn to let go of excessive behavior that is destructive in your life, controlling your physical cravings for Lust.

You are learning to fine-tune and cultivate the qualities of Venus. Learning how to give and receive love and affection, learning how to let go in matters of love in a healthy way in order to love more deeply and unconditionally, learning karmic lessons through personal love relationships, developing healthy habits of giving love to others without expecting anything in return, sending love and blessings to everyone that crosses your path .

Jupiter: You are learning to fine-tune and cultivate the qualities of Jupiter. Acquiring spiritual wisdom, becoming an expert and leader in one particular subject, teaching others, learning to be expansive and generous, giving in charity, learning how to channel wealth properly, spreading wisdom in all four corners of the world, learning deeper spiritual truths, sharing your truth, accepting other people’s truths without trying to change them, accepting other’s religious views with equanimity.

The native should always respect his guru or seniors and care his children. Jupiter is the Karaka for children, Guru, elderly person. So we should be concerned and careful about these aspect of life. With Jupiter Atmakaraka we have to learn lessons about these areas of life. We have some unfinished Karma from past lives regarding the area Atmakaraka Jupiter signifies.

Saturn: You are learning to fine-tune and cultivate the qualities of Saturn. Learning how to suffer life, learning how to withstand suffering and pain with equanimity of mind, learning yoga of mind and body to acquire equanimity in pain and suffering, learning to become detached in matters aspected by Saturn in a chart, learning detachment and equanimity, helping others in their suffering, helping the sick, the poor, and the elderly live better lives, giving in charity to those in need, helping to reduce the suffering of others.

Rahu:

The person trusts others too easily, and as a result often finds himself cheated or deceived, and a risk is there that the same person may cheat others in return in a never-ending cycle of cheating.

The person should learn to accept deceit and move on.

Foreign people/places also have a vital role to say with this graha.

You are learning to fine-tune and cultivate the qualities of Rahu. Learning how to temper your deepest yearnings and desire, learning how not to indulge in the things influenced by Rahu in the chart, channeling the desires of Rahu towards the spiritual Sattvic realm and away from Rajas.

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Saturn Direct 29th September 2020

Saturn turns Direct in Capricorn on September 29, 2020

Saturn is the great distributor of Karma, a planet that represents reality checks.

When saturn was retrograde , we were forced to face some truths we were escaping, take responsibilities we were hiding from, and accept our life and our reality as it is without hiding, projecting, deflecting, blaming, or dreaming.

everyone is working on accepting a particular truth or reality.

Saturn turning direct today allows us to move forward.

All of the things you have been working on internally are about to materialize. And all of the things you realigned and/or accepted internally are going to allow you to readjust your life, live differently, and manifest different outcomes.

The more responsibilities you took internally during the retrograde motion, the more you’ll find desirable changes in your life now that Saturn is direct.

Responsible Saturn, our planetary rulemaker stations direct in practical Capricorn on September 29, helping us to solidify all those beneficial new habits that we created for ourselves when the ringed planet started moving in reverse, back on May 11. 

Now that saturn is direct Focus and motivation lead to productiveness, achievement, and recognition.

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ADDICTION- ENSLAVED

To be addicted to a substance is truly to be enslaved by that substance. The substance controls you. But that also means the people who provide that substance control you, in a way. And you are also a slave to seeking money so that you can buy the substance, even if that means stealing to get the money. You essentially become enslaved to everything having to do with getting and using that substance. The substance (and everything connected to it) controls you.

The cycle of addiction begins as a response to a stressful problem (getting drunk to avoid dealing with a bad job, running to get away from a bad marriage) or as an attempt to produce certain feelings (as Harvard psychologist David McClelland and his coworkers showed, many men feel a sense of power while drunk).

These feelings, in turn, lead into a cycle that makes the addiction harder to escape. For example, a man who abuses his family when he is drunk may feel disgusted with himself when he sobers up—so he gets drunk again to boost his self-esteem.

Soon the addictive experience feeds on itself. It becomes central to the person’s life, and it becomes a trap.

While most alcoholics/ addicts want to escape from facing their harsh realities and trauma. They fail to realise that they are now enslaved by a substance which not slowly destroys them , but their families too,

In addiction, moderation is lost, and what initially starts as something more pleasurable, with few, if any, consequences (like substance use, sex, pornography, impulsive eating…) eventually shifts into the primary source of conflict infiltrating numerous aspects of one’s life. What distinguishes addiction from a ‘problem behavior,’ is the brain becomes rewired to view the addiction (i.e. alcohol/drug(s)/behavior(s) as an essential survival mechanism rather than the ‘thing’ that has spiraled out of control.

Trauma, including adverse childhood experiences, is a major cause of substance abuse/addictions.

Trauma can be defined differently for everyone, and the presence of trauma can at times lead toward addiction.

Trauma and addiction are often co-occurring disorders, and need to be treated as such.

Trauma is the natural effect that happens when our body is in such a heightened state of stress that we are unable to process an experience in a typical manner. Trauma then, is less about the event and more about how the memory is processed within the brain, due to the stress level of the body at the time of the experience.

What may result in trauma for one person may or may not result in trauma for another.

Trauma Creates a State of Discomfort that Fosters an Urge to Escape

Our emotions and our body sensations give us tremendous information and cues about our presence in our environment. After trauma, the body enters a more constant state of hyper arousal and it alters the stress, threat response. This can lead to hyper vigilance and even feelings of being ‘crazy.’

An event that you cognitively may recognize to be a low threat situation can spark a loud threat response in the body (rapid heart rate, feelings of panic…).

The body is not intended live in this constant state of arousal and will learn how to disconnect from its physical, emotional and even cognitive experiences. The exhaustion of living in such a state of stress, can lead to the desperation to numb out, check out, or change the way you are feeling… all of which are desires fueling addiction. Addiction becomes all about seeking the drug or behavior that fosters the addiction – this tunnel vision creates the ultimate way to numb out, checkout.

1 in 5 children grow up in a home where a parent abuses drugs or alcohol. Witnessing the trauma of a parent suffering addiction at a young age has long-term effects on the child. Children growing up seeing a parent addicted to drugs or alcohol are more likely to develop substance use disorders in their adulthood. They are also 3 times more likely being neglected, physically, and sexually abused. Seeing a parent on drugs often creates distressing emotions which not only create delays in learning and development, but pronged mental and emotional disorders.

Since children are still developing their personalities and are vulnerable to external influences, they run the risk of repeating such behaviors. Children may be exposed to aggression or violent behavior due to a parent or both parent’s drug use. Arguments between parents may be normal, causing the child emotional distress as they witness family members fighting.

Early exposure to a home divided by drug use can cause the child to feel emotionally and physically neglected and unsafe. As a result, they can become more mentally and emotionally unstable. Children may develop extreme guilt and self-blame for a parent’s substance abuse. They may develop feelings of unworthiness for disturbances around the home or develop dysfunctional attachments in their adulthood. In extreme cases, children can be removed from the home and placed in foster care.

The effects of drug and alcohol addiction can be both short-term and long-term. Peaceful, loving homes can be divided by the strain caused by drug and alcohol abuse. Conflict becomes normal as family members fight to engage in a son or daughter who abuses heroin, for example. Trust begins to erode. Relatives may become more guarded if a relative abusing illicit substances acts with aggression or hides their disorder in secrecy. Marriages can end due to changes caused by addiction. Communication becomes more difficult, highlighting frustration.

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Heart Chakra – ANAHATA

Original name in Sanskrit: Anahata

Element: Air

Planets: Venus

Physical association: Heart, lungs, circulatory system, arms, hands

Psychological function: Love

The heart chakra – the wellspring of love, warmth, compassion, and joy is located in the center of the chest at the heart level.

Located at the center of the chakra system, the Anahata or heart chakra is often seen as the point of integration of personal and altruistic aspirations through love and relating. When this energy center is going on overdrive, it can blur the boundaries between oneself and others to the point of losing your sense of identity and misusing the power of love.

It means living your life with loving kindness and compassion towards others. It means that your heart is open to others and you inspire kindness and compassion in others. You create safe and supportive environment.

When your heart chakra is balanced, you feel surrounded love, compassion, and joy. You feel connected to the world around you .You are able to feel love for yourself and others in equal amounts.

OVER ACTIVE HEART CHAKRA

Excess within this chakra can present itself as: codependency, poor boundaries, demanding, clinging, jealousy, and overly sacrificing. Individuals displaying these characteristics tend to continually give to others and overextend themselves with little regard for their own well-being.

• Loving indiscriminately

• Lack of proper boundaries in friendships and intimate relationships

• Tolerating too much from others to the point of neglecting emotional self-care

• Acceptance of others without discernment

• Losing your sense of identity

• Giving to others or to a cause without restraints

• Saying yes to everything and everyone, even when it does not benefit you

• Codependency, being overly demanding of others

UNDERACTIVE HEART CHAKRA

• Being withdrawn and selfish

• Avoiding socializing, social interactions

• Being overly critical of others and oneself

• Lacking empathy

• Feeling isolated

Many people have an underactive heart chakra. Most of us have experienced a lot of heartbreak on this journey of life, and that can cause our heart chakra to shut down. When your heart chakra is underactive, you feel like it’s hard to get really close to anyone. You hesitate to let anyone in.You find it hard to connect with others and have a loner lifestyle.

You put yourself before others so much that you (or others) would call you selfish.

In an effort to protect our hearts we close them off from connection; from giving and receiving love. This closes off our ability to be compassionate, empathetic, and kind.

As a result, a lot of the physical symptoms of heart chakra imbalance are connected to the lungs, ribs, and heart. Look for the following: Hypertension, problems breathing, infection at the level of the lung, bronchitis, heart condition.

HEAL YOUR HEART CHAJRA

• Practice asanas that open your heart. Asanas are yoga postures that help you balance the mind, body and spirit. Heart chakra healing- yoga postures include eagle, camel, wheel, and any backbends.

Pay attention to your posture.

Most of us are walking around like hunchbacks, unconsciously closing our hearts. Begin to become aware of your posture while sitting, standing, and walking. Straighten the spine, engage the core, open the front of your chest, and drop your shoulders.

• Use the bija mantra, ‘YAM,’ associated with the heart chakra. Bija mantras are repeated tones that you say during mindfulness meditations, and are commonly used before or after a yoga practice. In yogic philosophy, YAM is the sound vibration that works with the opening the heart chakra. Repeat it to yourself any time you feel you are closing down.

• Meditate on your heart center. Imagine each inhale and exhale as a green color and imagine the color spreading throughout your entire body as you breathe. Imagine this green breath removing negativity from your heart as you exhale.

Herbs & Food nourishment: Lemon balm, all green foods & vegetables: kale, broccoli, spinach, chard, dandelion greens, parsley, celery, cucumber, zucchini, matcha, green tea, avocado, lime, mint, peas, kiwi, peas, spirulina, green apples.

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The Throat Chakra-Vishuddha

The Throat Chakra in Sanskrit is called Vishuddha that means “especially pure”.

In Hindu astrology or jyotish, the graha (planet) ruling the throat chakra is Buddha or Mercury.

The Element is Ether ( Akash).

Known as the Vishuddha chakra, it governs all areas of the mouth, jaw, throat, and thyroid gland. When the throat chakra is imbalanced, you may experience:

• hoarseness

• sore throat

• thyroid problems

• laryngitis

• neck pain

Deficiencies in the this chakra often contribute to a number of physical ailments that can include thyroid imbalances, hearing problems, tonsillitis, mouth ulcers, tinnitus, bronchitis, asthma and ear infections.

Signs of an underactive throat chakra:

◦ Introverted

◦ Insecure

◦ Fear of Speaking Up

◦ Small Voice

Signs of an overactive throat chakra:

◦ Arrogance, lying or manipulation

◦ Condescending

◦ Rude

• Inability to Listen

◦ Gossiping

◦ Overly Critical

An overactive throat chakra leads us to use our voice in negative ways; tendencies toward criticising, lying, gossiping, abusive language and interrupting all reflect over-activity, as do speaking inappropriately and spending too much time trying to make oneself heard.

On the other hand, excessive shyness, secretiveness, and an imperceptible voice, as well as being unable to express oneself, are the result of an underactive throat chakra.

In addition, a blocked or unbalanced throat chakra leads to a variety of physical ailments, including laryngitis, thyroid disease, dental problems, TMJ, and neck pain, in addition to excessive or compulsive eating.

Here are some self-care tips and tools you can use to strengthen your Throat Chakra.

Methods to help balance the Throat Chakra:

• Be an active listener. Try to lean into conversations. Stop trying to think of what you will say when the person stops talking.

• Spend time in silence. Rest your throat chakra for a bit. This can be great for people who simply talk too much!

• Get a neck massage.

• Vocalizing, singing, humming & chanting

• Speak your truth

• Allow yourself to share your feelings, thoughts and ideas

• Stop judging yourself and others

• Practice allowing of self and other

• Journal

• Gargle with salt water

• Rest your throat

• Lying on your back and consciously relax your jaw, neck and throat

• Express yourself through creative activities

• Deep breathing exercises

• Exercising the vocal cords can dispel blockages in the fifth chakra.

• Engage in Head Rolls and Neck Stretches

This yoga warm-up decreases stiffness in your upper back, neck, and jaw. Each of these areas can hold incredible amounts of tension and need to be stretched regularly.

In addition to body positions and breathing techniques, yoga also gives us sound and vibration to create Throat Chakra healing. The Throat Chakra vibrates with the sound “HAM” (pronounced HAUHM).

PRACTICE MINDFUL EATING.

You might probably ask yourself, how does this relate to your Throat Chakra? It does relate as the fifth chakra governs your mouth, tongue and throat. So whatever you consume, or eat, can create a serious blockage, and vice versa, blocked Throat Chakra affects your relationships with food.

Ask yourself:

• Do I speak my truth?

• What story do I want to tell the world in 2019?

• How can I best serve others with my voice?

• Do I use my words to hurt or heal?

• Am I able to express myself creatively?

• Would I consider myself a gossip?

• What subjects am I anxious to talk about?

• How can I be even clearer when communicating?

• Am I being integral with my word?

• How can I strengthen my voice?

• Am I comfortable singing or humming aloud?

• Who in my life do I struggle to communicate with?

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The Sacral Chakra

The Sacral Chakra is located just above the pubic bone and is responsible for passion, sexuality, intimacy, money, creativity, and joy. The balance of the Sacral Chakra allows us to improve our relationships with ourselves and others.

The planet MOON is associated with the sacral chakra and element is WATER.

As humans, it is part of our nature to create. This creativity can be expressed as procreation but the second chakra energy is certainly not limited to making babies. When we cook, bake, or garden, we are creating. We create when we find a new solution to an old problem. Any time we take raw materials, physical or mental, and transform them into something new, we are using our creative energy.

The sacral chakra is associated with the realm of emotions. It’s the center of our feelings and sensations. It’s particularly active in our sexuality and the expression of our sensual and sexual desires.

It is responsible for the Functioning of it’s the lymphatic and circulatory systems, reproductive organs, bladder, kidney, and large intestines.

Mentally, blocked sacral energy can be associated with addiction, repressed emotions, and lack of creative energy.

SIGNS OF DYSFUNCTIONAL SACRAL CHAKRA

• Dependency, co-dependency with other people or a substance that grants you easy access to pleasure

• Being ruled by your emotions

• Overindulgence in fantasies, sexual obsessions

• Or the opposite: Lack of sexual desire or satisfaction

• Feeling stuck in a particular feeling or mood

WAYS TO BALANCE SACRAL CHAKRA

The sacral chakra is connected to the element of water so nourishing your body, inside and out, with some H20 will do your sacral some good. It is recommended keeping your body hydrated by drinking lots of it. You can even make it fancy and more sacral chakra-friendly by adding a couple of slices of orange.

The sacral chakra is all about creative expression, so it makes sense that tapping into your artistic side and doing something creative would help open up this energy center.

Do some hip-opening movements

The sacral chakra is located right below your belly button so any hip-opening movements and poses will help get the energy flowing in that area. “You can do this by allowing your body to flow through dancing or dance-like movements, stretching your hips, and different yoga asanas or poses

Left nostril breathing called Ida Nadi breathing will help to open up the second chakra as it brings forth lunar energy. Simply close your right nostril with the first two fingers of your right hand and inhale and exhale through the left nostril, only for 8 to 10 breaths.

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Is Love Between A Couple Enough For A Love Marriage or even a Marriage to last happily In India? THE TRAGEDY OF ABUSE

A woman and a man fall in love with each other they go out on dates , everything goes amazingly well.

They live their best moments together and they finally decide to tie the knot , hoping to live the most blissful life together forever.

Then comes the meeting of the families and trying to connect them.

Now when the newly hitched couple quarrels, the boys’s parents take his side and the girl’s parents take her side. That creates a little rift between the couple.

No doubt the parents understand their son/daughter with whom they are very familiar. But they can do better when they practice loving the would be son-in-law or daughter-in-law and try to understand better the would child-in-law.

This simple gesture from parents can help the relationship of the children bloom.

After having established harmony and love between the families of the girl and the boy, only if there is some love left between the couple, they ‘get married.’

When two people become married, they form a world of their own.

They have their own experiences, have kids, raise them and when the time comes the kids get married and move out of the parents life.

What remains now in the family are the two people who got married, the two people who promised to spend their rest of the life together. They no longer have a say over their kid, because the kid now has his/her own family.

And that is how things generally work in other societies.

In India, that becomes a problem.

Sometimes ndian parents raise their kids with the expectation that they would take care of them, when they themselves become old, and that they would still be able to control his/her decision like they did when the kid was small.

There is nothing wrong with children taking care of their parents, infact each and every kid should or rather be blessed with the opportunity to do that.

However parents must be mature enough to respect the fact that whatever the kid does now is his/her choice and that he/she owes them nothing. Nobody owes anything to anybody in this world. Take pride in the fact that you have raised them to be independent.

It is surprising how love is not enough for a marriage. When a couple is in love, and want to spend their lives together, they still have to think of making the others in their life happy and if they don’t ; the same people will only try to ruin your relationship for their own ego by trying to create doubts for your partner or gaslight you into seeing them in a negative light .

Why is it so difficult to accept love as it is?

Sometimes you get lucky and you get married to the love of your life , you have these fairy tale expectations of living a dream lovely life with your partner and then comes the reality .

So many individuals specially females come up for a marriage consultation as they are depressed in their marriages because they have been repeatedly hurt, insulted, ignored and made to feel secondary by their spouse.

Most of the times the Indian parents wish completely contradictory things for their son and daughter after they get married.

They will teach their daughters to make their husbands everything and be responsible for him after they get married.

They want their daughters to have a man who puts them first , respects her , prioritise her and love her above all

But to their son they instil things like

“don’t forget your family after you get married”

“You should be more man-like. YOU cant run around behind your wife “

I guess the biggest fear of every Indian parent Is “will his wife take priority over us?” And this is where the parents need a lot of assurance from the son and daughter-in-law.

Earlier when their son used to spend time with his friends, his own self and outside, there was no need for him to be around the parent.

When wife comes in and she takes time and attention from him, parents complain and make their son very uncomfortable on spending time with his better half.

How does spending time with his wife cause problems to parents when his spending time with his friends, not coming home many times at night didn’t? 

The parents and the existing members of the family need to understand that they should give the new couple the time and space to form and deepen their bonds and they shouldn’t get insecure of their place and position in their sons life.

They need to understand that They have been there and they are important and will remain important and respectful , but the relationship of newly married couple is fragile like a new born baby and needs utmost attention, care and time to bloom like the same.

I want to ask the parents…Did any one complain or get jealous or insecure of your baby when you gave all your time and attention to the new baby in your life.

You became a new “mother” a new “father”, it was a new role and people supported you .

Then just when your son has a new role in somebody’s life as a “ husband “ why not just give him the space required to strengthen his relationship with his wife?

Most of the times the females of the house, mostly the mother and the daughter in law end up in a competition of who gets the priority of the son.

“ Jealousy “ is a natural human instinct, more common in females.

Sandwiched between the two Most men Side with mothers unknowingly trying to be a good son or may be out of the guilt of the parents being old but definitely scarring or sometimes abusing their wife! 

Most men end up Denying love to their wives in name of “she just came yesterday and my family has been there since I was born”

“I have to be a son first”

This is so common around us… the idea that the wife should always be placed less, given a feeling that she is less than others because it has been instilled in men to never forget your parents since childhood as a man.

Always an Indian kid is fed a belief that his parents are Gods.

These words, break down a woman emotionally , she feels attacked and like an outsider.

how do you then expect her to feel at home?

When you Try and comfort others here at the cost of her well-being ?

Men don’t even realize what they think are normal expectations from their wife are nothing but abusive patterns that break her down.

You Changed her life completely and don’t even want to accept this change for yourself?

Being unconditionally loving or a good husband doesn’t impose restrictions on being a good son ever.

But being an abusive husband in order to be a good son is the most disgusting thing you can do as a man .

Men don’t even realize what they think are normal expectations from their wife are nothing but abusive patterns that break her down.

When a women speaks her mind out the the in laws or even the man accuses her of being disrespectful that she doesn’t respect elders and her parents didn’t teach her anything.

How easy it is for men and their families to humiliate the women , her upbringing and her roots when she only expresses her opinion about something , thinking she is part of the family ..

What if you are given the same treatment for speaking your heart out dear men? Will you like it if the girls parents bring your upbringing or parents down ?

Then how can you let that happen to your wife?

Asking your partner to be ok with harassment or With sarcasm from your family in the name of being a good daughter in law member is incorrect.

Her respect and security should be your priority.

Men need to understand that You don’t show respect to your parents by disregarding your wife’s needs or disrespecting her.

Why should your relationship with your blood relation be so insecure that you need to show your wife less relevant in order to make your others comfortable .

If your wife treats you and loves you on basis of how well you please her family and compares you with her father and puts you down. How would that feel?

Men are bringing in feelings of humiliation, uncertainty, hopelessness, “why me” in their wives , while they are supposed to give her happiness

Men, Instead of giving their wife the security that they will love her no matter what, they put conditions of the family on her to it!

“You need to keep my family happy and that will make me Happy.

You need to gel with my mom. She is my everything . “

A good relationship with family is not just in your wife’s hand. Jelling with someone is not in her hand alone.

Every relationship requires Effort from both sides. A girl can’t try forever to please a mans family if they don’t respond to her positively it’s not her fault .

And it’s utterly disgusting of the men to base their relationship on the fact how well she pleases your family. Then you clearly don’t love your wife , you love your family in some obsessive way and only need a slave for them.

Men create anxiety for their wives by such conditions on her .

Men should give the security that no matter what they will love her.

Men should be the bridge between their wife and their family and they would stand by their wife until she becomes family… this would give her assurance..

Instead of giving the security that you will love her the most, you give your wife anxiety of being secondary 

Some men become defensive when they listen something that their family might have done or said , which bothers their wife . They go to the point of verbally abusing their wives.

Your wife is just expressing to you. Because you are the reason she’s there and a part of your family . She’s not bringing them down or disrespecting them , she’s hurt or feeling uncomfortable with something and she wants you to understand and give her the assurance that you understand her pain and are always going to be there for her. she deserves.

Being an outsider in the life of a man who is supposed to be a woman’s everything is heartbreaking and no woman deserves that.

The woman leaves her whole world and makes a new life with you, and men still see her as less part of their life.
The woman from whom men expect to love everyone in their family, care for them but they themselves are reluctant to give her love, make her feel special as they don’t want to upset others, how fair is that?

To the woman who men want to love their family as their own, they attack her, get angry, misunderstand her if someone in their family says a thing about her… as though they don’t believe her, as though she cannot be more right than others….

Men need to understand that their family Is there and will always be there and they should take them into confidence that the fact they would love their wife wouldn’t mean that now love them less.

instead of giving their wife the security that her values are respected, men give them her the anxiety that she is all alone 

To the MEN

Dare you make your wife look like the bad one.
Dare if you portray as a home breaker, disrespectful!
Dare if you say she doesn’t have the right values.
Dare if you say she cannot adjust or is moody or is always crying to seek attention!

All your wife needs is For you to give her Time , attention and priority and understand her emotions.

And men tag them as a home breaker for that? How unreal can they get?

Men make a villain of a woman because she spoke… they make a villain of her because she wanted to be equal… Loved, family like?

Really?

Your wife deserves security, compassion, kindness, the feeling of oneness, and protection. It’s your responsibility… abuse is usually what she Maybe getting and this would have been breaking her…

Both men and women need to understand , Yes you have your relationships, your existing family but if they are always going to be “mine” and the spouse is always going to be “they”or an outsider, you never really understand what marriage is all about!

Marriage makes you we first!

You become the core family!

No one should have a space between you two

If your spouse can’t be your priority

If their respect is not yours and vice versa

If you can’t treat each other as first family. You are better off not Marrying  just as yet.

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Parenting Or Abuse of Authority?

A bruise should not be the requirement for evidence of parental abuse.

There are many other ways a child can be harmed.

A parent who remains connected with their child, gets to know who their child is as a person, maintains the child’s trust as someone the child knows will help them when they have a problem, the parent may be strict or not but won’t be abusive.

I know a lot of parents who pretty much prevent their teenage daughters from dating or going out late nights. That is strict but not abusive.

This blog explains to all loving parents what dictatorial parenting looks like and how and why it fails to produce godly, happy children.

“Because we’re your parents” can mean a lot of things.

It can mean “we’re total control freaks who want to make sure you only do what we let you do,” or it can mean “we would never forgive ourselves if we let you do this and you got hurt, and we think that you getting hurt in some way is a likely outcome of you doing this, but we know you won’t accept our experience as a good basis for believing that.”

Blind Obedience Is expected from the child to the point the child is expected to worship the parent.

The child is taught at people who don’t comply with the parent’s beliefs are disobedient, rebellious, lacking faith, demons, or enemies of the faith.

Parents will go into Dichotomous Thinking, Dividing people into two parts: those who agree with the parent and those who don’t. The parent makes fun of, belittles, and shows prejudice towards other’s beliefs because they want their child to have the same belief system as them .

They will indulge in Elitism. The parent refuses to associate with people or groups they consider impure or unholy or not matching their standards , even restricts the child to do so.

If the child fails to adhere to their set system they can resort to

▪ Victim Card – When all else fails, parents play the victim card to control behavior.

▪ Gaslighting – Lying about the past to intentionally making a child doubt their memory, perception, and sanity.

▪ Projection – Parents dump their issues onto the child as the child did it.

▪ Twisting – When confronted, parents twist the truth to blame the child for their actions.

▪ Manipulation – Making a child fear the worst such as abandonment or rejection.

▪ The Stare – An intense stare with no feeling behind it.

▪ Silent Treatment – Punishment by ignoring for long periods of time.

▪ Rage – An intense, furious anger that comes out of nowhere, usually over nothing, startling and shocking the child into compliance or silence.

The parents who require Submission Requires that the child completely adopts the parent’s point of view. There is no room for differing opinions or questioning their authority. Name calling, chastising, and the silent treatment are common maneuvers into compliance.

Parents use their spiritual authority as justification for why the child should completely submit to them.

We can get caught up in the title and the authority we have and we let it go to our heads.

Are You Abusing Your “Parent Authority Card”?

Real power is the kind that does not involve threats or violence or manipulations .

That is when you know you are doing the right thing because others follow you out of respect and love not because of threats or violence.

There’s a thin line between being strict and abusive.

A strict parent is trying to help the child learn boundaries, without hurting his sense of self while the abusive parent will try to instil their own belief system, perspective , manipulate their child to look others with theirs perspective, limiting their child to grow , evolve , learn, from his/her own belief system ; stripping away his sense of self.

The more parents focus on what they want for their child and the less they focus on helping their children find safe, respectful, doable ways to explore what they’re curious about, the more damage the parents can do.

The best gift you can give your child is freedom while you take care of them simultaneously; freedom to experience life with their own perceptions and perspective , forming their belief system and a stronger sense of self.

That’s the best gift that I got from my parent, the freedom

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The Divine LOTUS

Lotus flower is a symbol of purity and divinity.

Primarily associated with the gods Vishnu, Brahma and Lakshmi, the flower’s opening petals symbolize spiritual awakening and the expansion of the soul.

The lotus is a flower that emerges from a very vile atmosphere, it usually blooms in muddy waters. However, despite its struggles, the lotus bud emerges from those waters, eventually demonstrating a magnificent bloom. Even after emerging from the mud, it remains unstained!

No wonder it is considered to be the most divine and is only awarded to those of the highest standing.

The lotus flower represents life.

Sometimes, our circumstances are not wonderful. We might find ourselves buried in conflict, hardship, or internal suffering. These conditions do NOT make us any less worthy or beautiful.

The ultimate aim of living beings is to perform its karma without bothering about the external factors, which is signified by Lotus flower.

Just because Goddess Lakshmi is seated on lotus, offering her 108 or 1008 lotus flower won’t help if you remain impure within mind.

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Planet Sun and Combustion

Sun is hot and Burning planet with massive amount of heat .

Sun is the Karaka for dharma (righteous)

Sun is considered a mild malefic in Astrology. Sun is also your Ego.

Whenever Sun Dasha comes it will burn you (cause hardships) in order to purify you .

Sun wants you to be righteous and it wants to Purify you for your growth on soul level.

Whenever a planet is close to sun , it is known to be in combustion .

Combustion means ‘planet under fire’ .

That planet can cause you suffering in life until you learn to be pure .

This makes the planet very angry .

Earlier life will cause you to act in EGO in that planetary signification of life and cause suffering .

Anytime a planet is combust it is advisable refrain from ego (sun) in regards to its signification and act in righteous way (dharma) in regards to its significations so as to avoid suffering and being burnt by heat of sun.

For example mars when in combustion will make you ACT out of ego, cause anger in you and will cause you trouble till the time you don’t do righteous actions and avoid ego clash with your brothers.

When Venus in combustion , it will make you act out of ego in relationships and females.

If sun is winning the planetary war you will let your ego be bigger in relationships than your love.

Early life will cause suffering in relationships because of your inflated ego.

Extra marital relationship (Adharma) is a big no no when Venus is combust as the sun lights will expose the hidden things and cause trouble and suffering in relationships or females in order to purify you.

The best is to be pure and righteous with females and relationships in order to gain Venus.( love, wealth, luxury )

Sun may represent your EGO. For some people EGO will be blinding their intellect or the mind. The mind does not work well when SUPER EGO is close to it.

If Jupiter is combust then it means that EGO makes the person think that he/she knows everything and there is no need for a guide, GOD, Guru or teacher.

In most cases Mercury (Buddhi – intellect) the planet for logic and intellect is combust.

The reason for this is that Sun and Mercury never get away more than 28 degrees from each other.

This actually means that the power of their intellect is overpowered by a false ego.

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